The Power of Listening: The Foundation of Effective Communication

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Commit. Do. Live. These three words aren’t just my motto they’re the pathway to transformation in every aspect of life, including how we communicate.

In today’s fast-paced, hyperconnected world, we’re surrounded by noise. Everyone is talking, posting, reacting but how many of us are truly listening? We’ve mastered the art of replying, but forgotten the skill of receiving. And that disconnection is costing us far more than we realize.

“Just listen and learn. To lessen the power of that negative tune, you must listen to the complete thought and not let emotion move you.”
– Lisa Charle (Yes! Commit. Do. Live.)

The Listening Crisis

Most people don’t listen to understand; they listen to respond.

Research shows that we retain only 50% of what we hear immediately after someone finishes speaking. Within 48 hours, that number drops to 25%. This isn’t just about memory. It’s a reflection of our collective listening habits.

The consequences are real:

Relationships weaken when people feel unheard.
Teams underperform due to poor communication.
Leaders make flawed decisions because they miss the deeper message.

Listening isn’t just a soft skill—it’s a survival skill. And when we fail to develop it, we miss the opportunity to create connection, build trust, and foster collaboration.

The Brain-Body Connection in Listening

After I lost 77 pounds, without dieting by focusing on the brain-body connection, I realized something deeper: transformation always starts within. The same is true for how we listen.

True listening isn’t just a mental task. It’s a physiological shift.

When you practice what I call “Yes! Listening,” your nervous system calms. Your breathing slows. You become present. You stop reacting and start receiving.

Yes! Listening is about showing up with:

Curiosity, not judgment
Presence, not distraction
Care, not control

It’s a choice to grow with grace, through every conversation.

Commit. Do. Live: Transformational Listening in 3 Steps

Listening well is an embodied practice. Like any habit, it can be trained—and the path mirrors the transformation I teach in wellness.

1. COMMIT to the Yes! Mindset

Decide to value understanding over winning. View every person as someone worth hearing, even if their delivery or worldview differs. Listening becomes an act of respect and curiosity.

2. DO the Brain-Body Work

Check your internal state. Are you already drafting your reply? Ground yourself. Breathe. Make eye contact. Use open body language. Respond, don’t react.

3. LIVE the Results of Real Connection

When you truly listen, people feel it. They’ll open up. Trust grows. And you become the person others want to share their real thoughts with.

The Health Benefits of Listening

Listening well doesn’t just strengthen relationships it improves your health.

Chronic “broadcast mode”—always proving, persuading, or defending—keeps your body in fight-or-flight. That tension wears down your nervous system, your immunity, and your mood.

But deep listening activates your parasympathetic nervous system—your “rest and digest” mode. The result? More calm, more clarity, and more well-being.

Listening can be healing.

Flipping the Script on Communication

Just like I teach people to flip the script on aging, we need to flip the script on how we communicate.

We’ve been taught to:

Be right instead of curious
Defend instead of understand
Fill silence instead of exploring it

But what if we turned that upside down?

What if:

We measured success by how much we understood, not how much we said.
We let silence invite deeper truth?
We became known not for being impressive, but for being present?

True influence doesn’t come from how much you speak. It comes from how deeply you listen.

Common Listening Barriers and How to Overcome Them

Here are three major obstacles to listening:

Judgment – Filtering what someone says through your own beliefs before understanding theirs
Assumption – Thinking you already know what’s coming
Distraction – Letting your phone, your to-do list, or your inner monologue steal your attention

How to shift:
🧠 Catch yourself in the act.
🧘‍♀️ Take a breath.
👂 Come back to the moment.

The most powerful change starts with awareness.

The Ripple Effect of Better Listening

Listening well doesn’t just improve your relationships it influences everyone around you.

Teams that listen become more cohesive and innovative.
Families that listen navigate conflict with more compassion.
Communities that listen build trust and inclusion.

Listening spreads. It sets a tone. And it becomes a quiet, powerful revolution.

Practical Tips for Becoming a Better Listener

You don’t have to overhaul your whole life—just start small.

✅ Put away your phone during important conversations
✅ Summarize what someone said before responding
✅ Ask a follow-up question instead of changing the subject
✅ Watch your body language are you open, engaged, and grounded?

Create simple listening rituals:

Phone-free dinners with family
Daily 5-minute check-ins with your partner or kids
“No-interruption” rounds in team meetings

Little shifts. Big impact.

The Quiet Revolution

In a world that rewards being the loudest, choosing to listen is radical.
It says: “You matter. I want to understand.”
It turns connection into an act of transformation.

Great communicators aren’t always the best talkers—they’re the ones who create space for others to be seen and heard.

So next time you’re in a conversation, resist the urge to fill the silence.
Resist the need to prove your point.
Instead, just listen.

You might discover something deeper than words:
Real connection. Real transformation. Real you.

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Frequently Asked Questions

1. How do I know when it’s time to shift my goals or vision?

If your current goals no longer energize you or feel misaligned with your evolving values or market needs, it may be time to reassess. Ask: Does this still serve my purpose? Am I playing small out of comfort or fear? When your goals stretch you without draining you, you’re on the right path.

2. What’s the best way to empower my team without losing control?

Start by setting clear expectations and providing the tools they need to succeed. Delegate real ownership, not just tasks and allow for creative freedom. Trust is key. Check in regularly, but resist the urge to micromanage. Leadership grows when space is made for others to rise.

3. How do I stay motivated after hitting a major milestone?

Celebrate it fully. Then take a step back and ask, What’s the impact I want to create next? Motivation often comes not from doing more, but from doing what matters most. Reconnect with your bigger purpose and reimagine the next level of your journey.

4. What’s one simple way to start innovating again?

Block time each week just for curiosity and experimentation. Read something outside your industry, brainstorm “wild” ideas with your team, or explore an unmet need in your customer base. Innovation thrives in play, not pressure.

5. How can I future-proof my business or leadership approach?

Prioritize adaptability. Build flexible systems, diversify your skills (and your team’s), and keep learning. Watch trends outside your industry, and prepare for the unexpected by creating backup plans that aren’t reactive, but proactive.

6. How do I build a legacy, not just a profitable brand?

Start by asking: What values do I want to be remembered for? Then live and lead by them consistently. Mentor others, document your systems, and create structures that thrive without your constant presence. Legacy is built on intention, integrity, and impact.

7. What are the top signs of complacency I should watch out for?

Avoiding risk or experimentation
Saying “this is how we’ve always done it”
Lack of professional development
Disengaged team members
Ignoring customer or market shifts
When these show up, it’s time to re-engage and rethink.

8. How often should I evaluate success metrics or KPIs?

At least quarterlybut ideally with monthly pulse checks. And remember: KPIs should reflect both performance and impact. Make sure you’re measuring what really matters—not just what’s easy to track.

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Lisa Charles

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The Power of Listening: The Foundation of Effective Communication

Introducing Reunite – Reconnecting with Families and Friends

The Listening Crisis

The Brain-Body Connection in Listening